For those of you who remember Bebo.com, the social network now only used by people who really, really hate Facebook for some completely unknown reason (it’ll probably be dead soon as well), you’ll remember the little “quiz” things everyone used to copy and paste from other people’s Bebo profiles in order to kill some time. Bearing in mind that this was before the days of FarmVille and CaféWorld and all the other crap applications everyone on Facebook seems to use, there wasn’t really much else to do.
And I don’t play FarmVille. Or any other games on Facebook.
I have a Bebo account (update: not any more), but I don’t use it at all. Other than to go and find one of those nice little quiz things to fill in, in order to fill my blog with something.
So here it is, The Ultimate Guide to Andrew Johnston (in Bebo Style).
Full Name: Andrew Nicholas Johnston
Age: 16
Brithdate: The 9th day of the 9th month (that’s September the 9th if you’re bad with month numbers).
Birthplace: Aberdeen, Scotland, UK. Mainly because the hospital in Orkney only sometimes handles births.
Current Location: Orkney, Scotland, UK.
Heritage: No idea. Given my last name (Johnston) I’d imagine it might be rooted in Scotland and Ireland. To be more specific, I’d say it’s Annandale, but I can’t be absolutely sure about that. I was never any good at history or anything like that.
Religion: I don’t follow any particular religion myself, but I don’t reject religious people, religion in general, or the things religion says. If you want this in one word, put me down as agnostic.
School: Kirkwall Grammar School, which isn’t actually a “grammar school” in the traditional sense, but retains the name for no real reason. I don’t like the school, but to avoid expressing my opinion on it, I will simply state that – yes, the school is indeed an SQA centre.
GPA: …isn’t used in the Scottish (or the English) education system, so I don’t have one.
Grade: Assuming you’re talking about the American term for what I call a “year”, I’m in S5, which is the Scottish education system’s term for Year 12 (if you’re in England) or 11th grade (if you’re in America or Canada).
Tattoos: None, and I don’t really want one either. It’s mainly the thought of having something that “permanent” on my skin. Yes, you can laser it off or whatever, but then I’d just have wasted loads of money, wouldn’t I?
Piercings: No thanks.
Hair colour: Brown
Eye colour: Hazel
Height: I have a height, yes. Don’t ask me what is, because I don’t have a clue.
Shoe Size: Fairly big. I’m nearly always wearing shoes which don’t say what size they are on the inside, so don’t ask me to check there. Also, I’m too lazy to remove my shoes for a blog post.
Favorites
Food: Pasta
Beverage: Coffee – we have a “Starbucks” in Orkney which isn’t actually called Starbucks but has a contract with them to sell Starbucks coffee, and yeah, it’s fairly good. I don’t know whether Starbucks themselves are good though. Maybe it’s all in the way you make it.
Movie: I don’t watch movies. Like, ever. But if you asked me to select one that I have watched from the, like, three that I’ve ever watched, I’d probably choose either The Day After Tomorrow or A.I. Artificial Intelligence.
TV Show: It’s a contest between The Office, Newswipe and Screenwipe. And by The Office I mean the UK version and not the American The Office, because the American one is rubbish.
Ice Cream: I dunno, actually – whatever happens to be around.
Restaurant: Pfft, no, I don’t go to restaurants. I spend my time inside on my laptop. I don’t go outside.
Sport: I don’t like sport, but if you’re forcing me, I enjoy swimming. Not competitive swimming, mind you. Just going for a swim. Sometimes.
Hangout Spot: Nowhere. I don’t “hang out”.
Store: Whatever one sells things I want to buy at any particular moment in time.
Book: Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. I have all of them (minus the Eoin Colfer one) in one big book, and it’s almost, but not quite, exactly like a Bible.
In a Guy/Girl
Eye Color: Yes.
Hair colour: Yes.
Long or Short: Maybe.
Height: Yes.
Personality: Yes.
Hot or Cute: Define “hot”. Define “cute”.
Age: It doesn’t really matter. Probably within 2 years either way from my age if you’re forcing me to, because it’d probably seem weird otherwise, but.
Muscular or Skinny: Both of those. To be honest, I don’t decide any of the things you’ve asked in my head before I meet people in the Outside World. If I plan to meet “The Perfect Guy (or Girl)” then I’ll never meet him. Or her.
This or That
Family Guy/South Park: Family Guy, because I’m bored at about 23:35 each night and BBC Three can always supply something I don’t need to think too much about to watch. Also, I hate Viva, and it’s the only channel on Freeview that actually shows South Park.
Cartman/Kenny: I refuse to answer this, since I don’t watch South Park.
Peter/Stewie: Stewie. Why? I don’t know. I don’t even know why I watch Family Guy. Ever.
Pepsi/Coke: Pepsi, because it tastes better than Coca Cola, and you all know it. But in reality, my favourite is Ubuntu Cola, because it’s Fairtrade.
Sprite/7-Up: Honestly, I really don’t think there’s a difference between them other than their branding. Based on branding, I prefer Sprite, because they don’t have stupid cartoon characters drawn on their cans. But I don’t drink either of them much.
Mountain Dew/Red Bull: Haha, it’s “Mtn Dew”, not Mountain Dew! Nevertheless, I’ve never had either of them. I like the idea of Mountain Dew more though, because I hate Red Bull’s branding.
School/Church: School.
Love/Money: Love, because money is an artificial concept which humans created so that some humans could think of themselves as “better” than others for having more money (see: Conservative Party). Arguably, love may be an artificial human concept as well, but at least – I hope – we’re all equal in the eyes of love.
Homework/Test: Tests, surprisingly, because tests always have very clear directions and are very orderly, and I seem to crave order and erratic, unclear things like homework just interrupt my natural rhythm.
Movie at Home/Movie in Theater: I never watch movies, but if I did, I’d prefer them at home. But with a home system to rival the cinema. I don’t have the kind of money for that, but who said you have to take money into consideration for this quiz thing?
Comedy/Romance/Horror: Comedy. Horror movies scare me ’cause I’m a wimp, and…I don’t know, I haven’t watched enough romance movies to really judge.
Pants/Shorts: “Pants”, which in America means trousers and over ‘ere means what you wear under your trousers. I mean trousers, so you know.
Summer/Winter/Fall/Spring: Summer, but winter’s lovely for spending some time with the laptop, coding something. Though I do that in summer as well. And I have to point out that we call fall “autumn” here in the UK.
Christmas/End of the School Year: End of the school year, because it means a long summer holiday in which I can get stuff done that I put off because of school and revision and stuff.
Warm/Cold: Warm, especially in the morning, under my duvet, when I’m supposed to be getting up. That sort of warm is the best warm, even if it does turn into panic after a while since I always spend too much time there.
Italian/Chinese: Italian.
Love Life
First Love: Shh…be quiet, you.
Longest Love: Hmm…I wonder how many more questions there will be?
Person you like now: Several people. If you mean “like” (including the quotation marks), then that’s not really anything to do with you, is it?
Do you believe in the one: I don’t know.
Do you believe in love at first sight: Absolutely not.
First thing that comes to mind
School: Scottish Qualifications Authority.
Banana: Flamboyant.
Apple: Melon.
Red: Communism.
Winter: YouFail.org.
Church: Antidisestablishmentarianism.
TV: Kites, one of the BBC One idents.
Food: The strawberry sherbert boiled sweet thingy I’m eating.
Pop: Bubble wrap.
Cat: The XKCD theory.
Magazine: The Daily Mail, a “newspaper” which I hate.
Miscellaneous
Bedtime: Any point between 00:00 and 02:30. But “any point” can only be every five minutes. I can’t go to bed at 2 minutes past an hour, or at 18 minutes past an hour, for example.
Bed Size: I, for no reason, have a double bed, with only one person to sleep in it.
Have you smoked: No.
Have you drank: No.
Been stoned: Nup.
Last movie you watched: Don’t remember, actually. It’s been a while.
Last song you heard: According to my Last.fm profile, it’s The Everglow by Mae, but I wouldn’t trust my Last.fm profile, really.
Last person you talked to: My mother.
Last thing you said: “Yeah.” (it was her phone that rang)
Last thing you ate: I’m currently eating a strawberry sherbert boiled thingy.
Why are you taking this survey: Because I can.
There you go.
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